Hey its been so long since I last posted here. But with nothing much to write, I thought I will share one of my most moving experience. I wrote this two and a half years back and I am re-printing the experience un-edited. Lot has changed since then,but the feeling has not changed. This happened in summers of 2006 and well...you can read the rest.As always its a very looooong post..But as I said "Old habits Die Hard" :) enjoy (atleast try to)
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People say it takes few seconds for a person’s life to change. For me it took only a single moment….and from then on I have embarked on a journey towards self realization…towards serving my society…towards helping my fellow people who were just strangers before….Its just a start but I am sure the journey will continue…
Till now I was leading a life of not my choice but simply following what others told me was right…It took me twenty years to come out of that shell but I am glad that I didn’t wait for twenty more. I always wanted to do something for the society but somehow wasn’t able to take that initial step. There were some inhibitions in my mind, probably about from where to start. But this summer I decided that I had to start it now. It wasn’t worth it living like this and running away from something I really believed in.
I was fortunate to come across AID Delhi chapter through net. I called up the number given on the website and was lucky that it was Somendra to whom I talked first. Whatever doubts I had in my mind he removed them and for this I will be always grateful to him. He told me everything about AID Delhi activities (for like half an hour on phone!!) and I knew that I was going to associate myself with this. He asked me to go to Khoj project at Hyatt and meet Pawan.
When I first talked to Pawan on phone I imagined him to be a 35-40 year old guy with some degrees in sociology. I went straight to Hyatt after my training but to my surprise he was not what I had thought him to be. He was of my age group only. With him was Zubair. Both of them called up the kids there and within seconds everyone came running towards them and hugged them. I was moved to see that but was still nervous whether I would be able to make the same rapport with the kids or not. They introduced me to the kids and the kids were really excited to see me there which made me comfortable. Then Pawan gave me the responsibility to do any activity for that day. I asked the kids if they would like to play some game. But to my surprise the kids said that they wanted to study. I couldn’t believe this because I had thought that kids of their age wanted to play games only. But seeing their zeal to study I realized that throughout the day they are having fun only so probably studying is a hobby for them which is great. After my first session with the kids I was deeply moved. That feeling was really overwhelming and I just couldn’t control my emotions. I was amazed at the work Pawan and Zubair were doing and it changed my point of view towards life and people. I couldn’t speak for some time and decided that I would work with Pawan and Zubair for forty five days of my stay in Delhi.
Next day I went to the Dilli Haat center with a positive view about life and with more confidence. As I entered the park one of the girls (Pooja) came running towards me yelling “Bhaiya aa gaye” and hugged me. I was meeting her for the first time and still the affection she showed towards me was something totally unexpected. It was a feeling which can be only felt at that moment and can’t be explained. These kids only want love and affection and they reciprocate it with pure feelings. They are so joyous and fun loving even with so many problems in their life while we keep cribbing over trivial matters. Even though these kids were not trained I could really see that some of them were really sharp. They were really smart unexpected of their age and proper care and guidance can make them do wonders.
As my internship was going on at that time I decided to engage myself during weekends only till June end. I also attended the OR of AID held at IIT D and there I came to know about various other projects AID Delhi was involved in. I met many like minded people there and the stereo type image I had (and most of the people still do) of social work was gone. Now I know that its my social responsibility to work towards betterment of my society. I was probably very sentimental there but after to talking to people like Anuj, Somendra and many more I formed a practical view of the goals I wanted to set for my life and for this I am indebted to them all. The best thing about AID Delhi was that everyone was helping in the way he/she wanted. Some were teaching, some were giving lessons on computers, health, etc. Some were their in the publication team, fundraising team or taking care of finances which was really amazing. I now knew that every person can contribute without being forced to do so…..
I am a positive person but after these few days I started feeling more energetic. The next step was to decide how I wanted to help. I wanted to get involved in many projects but due to time constraints I decided to limit myself to Khoj and one fundraising event at FSS where I was doing my internship.
With the help of managers from corporate communication of FSS I was able to organise a fund raising event for Parichay. It was the first time I met Vijay Bhaiya and to see his level of dedication and commitment towards empowering unprivileged kids was simply amazing and heart-touching. Above all his modest and polite nature reflected his attitude towards life. I have no ideals in life but seeing real life heroes like Vijay Bhaiya, Pawan , Zubair and many others who are working towards a noble cause with great zeal has really motivated me. I am short of words to describe these people. It’s only when you meet them that you realize that life can be beautiful if you serve others. Vijay Bhaiya is a really great role model and I feel honoured that he shared his knowledge and wisdom with me.
Here I would like to mention one more event which I had only seen in movies and could never imagine that I would be able to do it although now it seems pretty natural. One day when I went to Dilli Haat center to teach the kids it started to rain quite heavily. So Pawan and all decided to have a little fun. He, Zubair and the kids began dancing and singing in the rain in front of the entrance and also invited me. I didn’t hesitate for a moment and joined them. We sang, I don’t know, like every type of song and it was simply amazing. Everyone around was watching us in disbelief but we really didn’t care. We were just having fun and were in a totally different world. The joy and happiness on the face of all the kids was something I would cherish for the rest of my life. It was the dance of joy and probably rain gods were also helping us. We had so much fun and later few visitors there also joined us. I don’t know if I would ever get a chance to relive that moment but certainly that was one of the most enjoyable moment of my life……
From July onwards I started going regularly to the Hyatt center. The kids there are really disciplined and are always more than eager to learn something new. Whether it’s drawing kites and apples or learning how to write their names they are always excited about it. One thing I learned there was that once you build up the trust with these kids then you really don’t have to make an extra effort to teach them anything new. They make these things easier for you. One month with them finished so quickly that I just wanted to stay back but I knew that I had to go back. I so much wanna come back and play cricket with them on Saturdays…or maybe read to them a new story with some moral which I always hoped some of them might be able to grasp….or do “boogie woogie” with them…probably what I had to offer was very miniscule…but what I learned from them was really big…to be happy in the time of adversities…to think like life has no worries. Well these things can’t be learned in school or college….
I really miss Ganesh, Kalicharan, Maya, Rani, Peter, Pooja and many more kids..
But most of all I miss Gutti, sweet two year old girl, who is very naughty but always smiling and always looking for a ride on my arms…their radiant and bright faces make me more strong and determined towards my fulfilling my duties… The day I was leaving and met them they were not willing to let me go which almost brought me to tears. So much love in such a short time….
If there is one thing that I have achieved during my stay it was to see my young brother Aaroosh, who is only 11 years old, ask me to take him with me to Hyatt center. I never had to force him to come with me but to see him so concerned made me feel proud of him. I hope many kids understand this and become more responsible towards their society.
I feel happy for one thing that finally brochure and a power point presentation for Khoj is now ready. For this credit goes to Selva, Rohit and Divya with of course invaluable inputs from Pawan and Zubair. I am sure now it would be easier to present the work carried out in Khoj in a better way coz I personally feel that they need to be given more credit for their work.
Well one great thing about all the people I have met is that they all are practical about the goals they are going to achieve. They all know that it won’t be easy for all the kids to leave their daily jobs or the slums they are leaving in but at least they can learn and understand some skills and values of life which will help them decide between right and wrong correctly.
I hope my relationship with Khoj and AID Delhi will continue in future also. Shortly I will be starting one project in my campus also and will update all of you bout it.
There are many people whom I admire and respect and who have helped me understand life in a more meaningful way. Somendra for his energy and ideas and the level with which he motivates everyone is exceptional. Pawan and Zubair for their determination and the sacrifices they have made and for their vision about Khoj. Anuj for his intellect and calm persona. Selva, who goes one step ahead to help others. Vijay Bhaiya for all the good things he told me about life. Chirag who looks so young and naïve but has a lot of determination and is doing a great job. I apologise to everyone else whom I failed to mention. This one month has given me a lot of friends and I wish you all best of luck and hope that you all achieve success in life. I would be visiting Delhi soon and would meet you all then. Do keep in touch….
If ever I am disillusioned or stray away from my path then the efforts of these people will pull me back………
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Tuesday, November 25, 2008
Thursday, January 24, 2008
Why God Why??
After reading this incident all of you will have a flashback (Atleast I will put an effort to ensure this)...You all will remember some incident from your own life where you tried..really hard...even though you suspected the worst thing might happen..but you tried..only to.......wont give it in so easy..you gotta read the whole story...
24th January, 2008
Well it was just another ordinary day in my life. Slept late at night (or early in the morning..depends on which breed you belong to). Felt lazy to come out of my quilt and so woke up late in the afternoon (or early in the evening). But by the time I woke up I had missed an epic.A masterpiece. Yes, I missed Sachin's Century in the ongoing Adelaide test. O' Dear Lord. Such beautiful innings. Such class from him. Every article on net said that he played a complete innings. And I missed it coz of sheer laziness.
I saw the highlights in UG Club and he was simply mind-blowing. Determined not to miss his knock I planned for a night-out and see the match live from 6 am in my hostel's TV room. I invited like minded friends to join me. Those who resisted were given a tempting offer of cookies and namkeens. Everyone was hoping for a double century from Sachin (I was hopeful of a triple). I have never been so excited about any test match but from inside I knew this one was going to be special. So it began.....
25th January, 2008
It was just like another ordinary night-out. Chatting with friends. Browsing through orkut profiles of random gals. But yeah the real action was yet to come.
So at 5.30 my friend Anshul called. He got up to see the match (Well the passion for watching Sachin can even make laziest of all to rise so early). I packed the cookies and namkeens (yes that offer was for real) along with my quilt and marched to the TV room.
Even the cold chill outside couldn't stop the blood gushing through my body. Adrenaline was pumping. I was all set to watch the Master in Action. I switched on the TV with such great anticipation. But hey was my eyesight blurred. No no it was that familiar picture (actually no picture) of grey dots. Yes the cable was all gone. For a moment I just stood there not knowing what to do.But like a true (non)engineer i tried to pull the wire out and tried again. But to no avail. Then in a perfect desi style I banged on the TV hoping for a miracle. But again nothing happened.
I went out and tried to find out if the match was going in some other Hostel's TV Room. But no. We were the only enthusiastic bunch in this whole campus.
But I didn't give up. If I had to wake up the Director at this hour to see the match I was determined to that. But for a start I tried the Institute Cablewallah. But that *^#@!! phone was out of service. I called up my friend who lived outside but as luck would have it he had taken a room in the same hostel and had taken off the cable connection from his TV.
Just then I remembered that the Shop in Bus-T had a TV. So we decided to go there. Although we met few souls in between who advised us not to go there as there was a possibility that the shop owner had returned the TV we just didn't want to take any chances on missing out the match. Just to be sure I checked the score on my mobile. Yes, Tendulkar was still there though Dhoni had departed. But who cares. God was still there on the crease.
Luckily there was a rickshaw just outside the hostel (God is great) and without any hesitation we boarded it. But it seemed that somebody was just out there to screw us. The shop guy told us that he had put the TV away and seems like he had rented it for the T20 cup only. I ran to another shop which had a TV but........The electricity was gone. Of whole Roorkee city and there I cursed Electrical Engineers from IIT Roorkee. All of them. Useless fellows.
Anyways I thought it's better to just sip a cup of hot tea at Bus-T and watch the match at Cricinfo (Its not the same but still...)
But then again when you think that nothing can happen..When you lose all your hope..When you are sitting head down in a state of despair.....You get a miss call.
It was from Binny who was sitting in the hostel TV room. So was it possible....With the most optimistic feeling I called him back and......Yes the electricity was back on the cable. The match was on and the little master was also there.
I just ran off from the shop without waiting for any rickshaw.
When I reached the TV room me and my friend were both out of breath. Binny was just looking down upon us as if we were like complete fools from that google-airtel AD while he was that smart kid (a pathetic comparison I know but nothing else could sum up that feeling.)But seeing the score on TV re-energized us as Tendulkar had completed his 150. But Binny told us something which left me dumbstruck. Tendulkar had a muscle pull and the physio had been called. But what the heck. Knowing what a fighter the little champ is I was sure he will be back on with full vigour. But there were these stupid Ad's of Saral Investment testing my patience.
Ahhh Finally the match was on. And wow the master blaster was taking stance. He was ok. I knew it. Thank God.
Sachin was ready and so was I for the epic. First ball I was going to watch live...And there came Brett Lee running down the pitch with all his might and throwing the ball with all his might. It was a short pitched delivery..Rising above Sachin's head...He pulls it...Yes what a shot..It's going to be a six..oh no wait a minute..it's a mishit...No No Please no....
AHHHHHH.....*^#@^#....Hogg takes the catch....Its all over....
I shouted..Cursed...Sweared....AHHHHHHHHHH.....
Why God Why...Why this...I thought it must be like the worst nightmare I ever had...But no Sachin was out....I just couldn't believe it...It was like those moments where you feel so helpless..like all your dreams have been crushed...Shattered...
All this effort..all this running and searching....for what...atleast one boundary..even a single would have sufficed....
While the whole stadium was applauding his heroics I was just left cursing the bloody electrical engineers and my luck.
I just couldn't continue and left the room.
"Bhagwaan jab deta hai toh chhapad phaad ke deta hai.....
and jab leta hai toh...aage se peeche tak sab phaad ke leta hai"
Even though the possibility of Sachin getting out before I could watch the match was lurking inside my head I was sure it won't happen..Then why God Why..Suddenly I also remembered Shahrukh's dialogue "Jab Poori Qaynath....".Why this dialogue at this moment.Bloody SRK...
So friends this happens..When you try for something real hard....and I mean really really hard...you need to be ready for the worst results also..You need to prepare yourself for that...
But why me God..Why me Sachin...Why??? Hey wait a minute..On my way back from Bus-T my friend Gauri remarked that whenever he saw Sachin batting he got out on the first ball. And yes Gauri also entered the TV room along with me. And he was there when Sachin got out. *%#@~ Gauri..Its his fault.Kaali zubaan...He is gone...He is gonna get the best GPC..Something his *&#@ will remember forever...
So while I go and smack his ass out you people can just enjoy the flashback from your lives...
but still...Why God Why!!!
I know why. Coz there's still second innings to come and God will score a double in that :)
and yeah if I become the Dean of IIT Roorkee someday I will surely scrap Electrical Engineering..
24th January, 2008
Well it was just another ordinary day in my life. Slept late at night (or early in the morning..depends on which breed you belong to). Felt lazy to come out of my quilt and so woke up late in the afternoon (or early in the evening). But by the time I woke up I had missed an epic.A masterpiece. Yes, I missed Sachin's Century in the ongoing Adelaide test. O' Dear Lord. Such beautiful innings. Such class from him. Every article on net said that he played a complete innings. And I missed it coz of sheer laziness.
I saw the highlights in UG Club and he was simply mind-blowing. Determined not to miss his knock I planned for a night-out and see the match live from 6 am in my hostel's TV room. I invited like minded friends to join me. Those who resisted were given a tempting offer of cookies and namkeens. Everyone was hoping for a double century from Sachin (I was hopeful of a triple). I have never been so excited about any test match but from inside I knew this one was going to be special. So it began.....
25th January, 2008
It was just like another ordinary night-out. Chatting with friends. Browsing through orkut profiles of random gals. But yeah the real action was yet to come.
So at 5.30 my friend Anshul called. He got up to see the match (Well the passion for watching Sachin can even make laziest of all to rise so early). I packed the cookies and namkeens (yes that offer was for real) along with my quilt and marched to the TV room.
Even the cold chill outside couldn't stop the blood gushing through my body. Adrenaline was pumping. I was all set to watch the Master in Action. I switched on the TV with such great anticipation. But hey was my eyesight blurred. No no it was that familiar picture (actually no picture) of grey dots. Yes the cable was all gone. For a moment I just stood there not knowing what to do.But like a true (non)engineer i tried to pull the wire out and tried again. But to no avail. Then in a perfect desi style I banged on the TV hoping for a miracle. But again nothing happened.
I went out and tried to find out if the match was going in some other Hostel's TV Room. But no. We were the only enthusiastic bunch in this whole campus.
But I didn't give up. If I had to wake up the Director at this hour to see the match I was determined to that. But for a start I tried the Institute Cablewallah. But that *^#@!! phone was out of service. I called up my friend who lived outside but as luck would have it he had taken a room in the same hostel and had taken off the cable connection from his TV.
Just then I remembered that the Shop in Bus-T had a TV. So we decided to go there. Although we met few souls in between who advised us not to go there as there was a possibility that the shop owner had returned the TV we just didn't want to take any chances on missing out the match. Just to be sure I checked the score on my mobile. Yes, Tendulkar was still there though Dhoni had departed. But who cares. God was still there on the crease.
Luckily there was a rickshaw just outside the hostel (God is great) and without any hesitation we boarded it. But it seemed that somebody was just out there to screw us. The shop guy told us that he had put the TV away and seems like he had rented it for the T20 cup only. I ran to another shop which had a TV but........The electricity was gone. Of whole Roorkee city and there I cursed Electrical Engineers from IIT Roorkee. All of them. Useless fellows.
Anyways I thought it's better to just sip a cup of hot tea at Bus-T and watch the match at Cricinfo (Its not the same but still...)
But then again when you think that nothing can happen..When you lose all your hope..When you are sitting head down in a state of despair.....You get a miss call.
It was from Binny who was sitting in the hostel TV room. So was it possible....With the most optimistic feeling I called him back and......Yes the electricity was back on the cable. The match was on and the little master was also there.
I just ran off from the shop without waiting for any rickshaw.
When I reached the TV room me and my friend were both out of breath. Binny was just looking down upon us as if we were like complete fools from that google-airtel AD while he was that smart kid (a pathetic comparison I know but nothing else could sum up that feeling.)But seeing the score on TV re-energized us as Tendulkar had completed his 150. But Binny told us something which left me dumbstruck. Tendulkar had a muscle pull and the physio had been called. But what the heck. Knowing what a fighter the little champ is I was sure he will be back on with full vigour. But there were these stupid Ad's of Saral Investment testing my patience.
Ahhh Finally the match was on. And wow the master blaster was taking stance. He was ok. I knew it. Thank God.
Sachin was ready and so was I for the epic. First ball I was going to watch live...And there came Brett Lee running down the pitch with all his might and throwing the ball with all his might. It was a short pitched delivery..Rising above Sachin's head...He pulls it...Yes what a shot..It's going to be a six..oh no wait a minute..it's a mishit...No No Please no....
AHHHHHH.....*^#@^#....Hogg takes the catch....Its all over....
I shouted..Cursed...Sweared....AHHHHHHHHHH.....
Why God Why...Why this...I thought it must be like the worst nightmare I ever had...But no Sachin was out....I just couldn't believe it...It was like those moments where you feel so helpless..like all your dreams have been crushed...Shattered...
All this effort..all this running and searching....for what...atleast one boundary..even a single would have sufficed....
While the whole stadium was applauding his heroics I was just left cursing the bloody electrical engineers and my luck.
I just couldn't continue and left the room.
"Bhagwaan jab deta hai toh chhapad phaad ke deta hai.....
and jab leta hai toh...aage se peeche tak sab phaad ke leta hai"
Even though the possibility of Sachin getting out before I could watch the match was lurking inside my head I was sure it won't happen..Then why God Why..Suddenly I also remembered Shahrukh's dialogue "Jab Poori Qaynath....".Why this dialogue at this moment.Bloody SRK...
So friends this happens..When you try for something real hard....and I mean really really hard...you need to be ready for the worst results also..You need to prepare yourself for that...
But why me God..Why me Sachin...Why??? Hey wait a minute..On my way back from Bus-T my friend Gauri remarked that whenever he saw Sachin batting he got out on the first ball. And yes Gauri also entered the TV room along with me. And he was there when Sachin got out. *%#@~ Gauri..Its his fault.Kaali zubaan...He is gone...He is gonna get the best GPC..Something his *&#@ will remember forever...
So while I go and smack his ass out you people can just enjoy the flashback from your lives...
but still...Why God Why!!!
I know why. Coz there's still second innings to come and God will score a double in that :)
and yeah if I become the Dean of IIT Roorkee someday I will surely scrap Electrical Engineering..
Friday, January 11, 2008
Missing you my..........
At first I just couldn’t notice it. I ignored it as some common post-placement season blues. Or maybe it was just that I was missing the festive spirit.
But the feeling just started getting stronger. I could just feel it in my whole body. Something creepy. I was having strange dreams at night. Like something had been taken away from me which I would never get back. Something which everyone else around me enjoyed but I had lost it.
I couldn’t eat properly. Nor could I sleep. I was growing restless. I took a break from work and tried to relax but it was of no use. I tried listening to my fav songs but somehow I found them boring. I tried watching my fav TV sitcoms but even they were boring. I lost count of days. I tried talking to my friends and family but to no avail. I still couldn’t figure it out.
What was it?
It was a sense of something lost. I knew this much for sure.
Was I missing my friends? (Those bakar sessions,Nighouts...........)
Was I missing playing sports? (Inter IIT: still hurts)
Was I missing playing FIFA and CS? (Sucked but enjoyed)
Was I missing my home? (After all it's been more than two months since I last went back)
Oh god. I think I was missing some lost love? (Ahh...That awful pain in the stomach when your heart gets crushed...When you see the love of your life walking away with someone else..Hand in hands..When you wanna say so much but you the time has already ran past you)
Nah…Now I know it… I was missing………Going to department for lectures. Yes, you guessed it right. I have zero contact hours this semester. No lectures. No Tuts. No boring practicals. No more TS. No more of Endsems. Just plain 24 hours of vella time.
As people around me still worry about waking up early in the morning for going to their classes, worry about submitting tuts in time I sleep for 12 hours a day. Every day is a Sunday here.
As my friends worry about meeting deadlines in time, worry about working on weekends I take a break and go to home for ten days without taking anyone’s permission. It’s like a paradise.
And now that I know it, I simply love this feeling. I want to miss more of it. Six months of pure fun. So much time and so little to do. As
Calmness has prevailed. I feel relaxed now. As I prepare to pack my bags and leave for home for a break (don’t know when will I return) I am sure when I come back things would remain the same. You busy with your daily life while I will try to break my record of sleeping 26 hours at a stretch.
Enjoy
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